Best Day Ever

 Happy Sunday Everyone!

Yesterday my “unplanned plans” for the day fell through, so I decided to take myself out. My mission: Clothes shopping at the mall.

This may sound like no big deal… but for me it was. Due to my size I have never purchased clothes from a “mall store” and was limited to assisting my trim sisters in looking for items and holding their purses so they could try them on. Ugh… This got old really fast and I became unwilling to be a style consultant/purse holder and eventually stopped going out with them.

As I am now free from the confines of the plus size category I have been enjoying a freedom I forgot even existed; shopping in the regular clothing sections. There are so many more styles to choose from and I judge whether I’m going to purchase the item based on if I like it – not if it fits. Being confident in my now “average” size helped snag me another small victory this past week: I asked one of my coworkers where she bought her cardigan. TBH I’ve never asked anyone that question, because even if I knew where they purchase their clothes – the store wouldn’t have my size anyway. So why ask?

I drove to the mall, deliberately went straight to the store my coworker specified, grabbed a few items to try on and headed to the dressing rooms. The attendant escorted me to a room, hung up the clothes and left. I pulled on the items and looked in the mirror… See image 2/2015.

Transform!

I am now fitting in mall clothes! 😀

Thanks for reading!

-Anna San

 

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Perseverance

After the excitement of the holidays I’ve been feeling kinda bummed. Have new goals and resolutions I’m working on, which are good – but they are challenging and will take time to see progress; so very little motivation there. 😦 I also haven’t been able to hang out with my friends due to my work schedule which makes me feel disconnected. 😦 😦 And to top that off I’m already having to work overtime to meet January’s quota. 😦 😦 😦 Everything feels harder this month and to be honest, I really don’t want to do anything. Good thing I don’t rely on my feelings, huh? No matter what they say I am still at the gym four days a week.

Lets face it – weight loss is a bumpy ride and we all experience challenges along the way. My weight loss journey definitely hasn’t been an easy one and I hope that my previous posts haven’t alluded to such, because it couldn’t be further from the truth.

Early on I accepted several invitations to pity parties or would rationalize having “just one” and eat things that I  knew I shouldn’t. For example in September I ate five donuts in one week. FIVE. No, I didn’t gain weight from it (because I had already started changing my diet and exercise plan) but I lost some respect for myself. Instead of being reactive I became proactive. I stepped back and asked, “Why am I working against myself?” I spent quite awhile soul searching and in prayer. It came to the front that my inner child didn’t want to give up anything. I wanted to achieve weight loss and eat the donuts too.

For some, the “everything in moderation” mindset works well. As a sugar and food addict with a long history of unsuccessful weight loss attempts, I knew that it didn’t work for me. Armed with this new self-awareness, I refocused on what I wanted and why I wanted it, committed it to prayer and took steps to amend my habits.

First I asked my brother to get rid of the rest of the dozen donuts that I had been grazing on as I was too weak to resist them, then I stopped eating donuts at the weekly Coffee & Donuts after church but would still go for the coffee and the socializing. It was through this situation that I finally realized and accepted that I had to make a commitment to a complete lifestyle change.

After a few weeks of cutting the sweets, I experienced my first triumph over my sugar addiction when I threw away that donut on Halloween. It was a glorious and freeing feeling. It was then that I knew that I was mentally ready to take my weight loss to the next level by starting the 1,200 calorie diet …which I am still on today. 🙂

Don’t let the failures of today dictate your tomorrow. 

If you mess up, it’s okay. Take time to find out why, pray about it and make a commitment. Get right back on the bandwagon. I know you can do it. 🙂

Thanks for reading!

-AnnaSan

2015 Anthem :3

Right before new years I came across the cute AMV below featuring this awesome tune by Mindy Gledhill. The song resonated with me and I feel that it really captures the essence of where I am right now in my life journey. Whole Wide World has been dubbed my personal anthem for 2015 and I have it on my MP3 player to listen to during my workouts. :3

“Whole Wide World”

I’m gonna walk a hundred miles
I’m gonna whistle all the while
If that’s what it takes to make me smile
I’m gonna walk a hundred miles

I’m gonna run right up this hill
Summer sky or winter chill
If I gotta take a break I will
But I’m gonna run right up this hill

I wanna hold the whole wide world
Right here in my open hands
Maybe I’m just a little girl
A little girl with great big plans

I’m gonna go and take a chance
I’m gonna learn to ballet dance
Learn a little something ‘bout romance
I’m gonna go and take a chance

I’m gonna live a crazy dream
Impossible as it may seem
Doesn’t matter what the future brings
I’m gonna live a crazy dream

[Chorus]

You tell me, “don’t try it”
I’m warning you that I won’t buy it
All failure is fleeting
I trust it always has its meaning

Do you have a personal anthem?

Thanks for reading!

-AnnaSan