A time for rest

This morning the Lord gave me pause about my plans for the day. I had my swim bag ready to go, plus I wanted to go out and about in the evening and I have my weekend filled.

The whispers of a cold that I talked about the other day are becoming murmurings and are gaining volume despite my efforts to hush them with tea, water, honey, lemon, ACV, lozenges and vitamin c. God gave me clarity to see that I had to choose between my two main objectives for the weekend. Hanging out with friends, or getting to the pool.

If I chose the pool, I would have to cancel my plans with my friends as the wet hair-cold air combo would push me into full blown cold mode. Opportunities to hang out are very rare, so I chose friends and let go of my schedule. There is a sense of disappointment however I am beginning to wonder if my past ill-timed illnesses were a form of spiritual warfare.

As you know predators tend to separate their targets from their herds and attack. The less connection I have, the more I doubt myself, second guess what I want to say and beat myself up over not being perfect. The more connected I am, the more confident I feel, am more sure in my words and let perfection take a hike as it is more important to keep doing and growing.

That in mind, what bad habits are leaving openings for the devil to exploit? The main one I can think of is not getting enough rest. If you recall Elijah had gotten tired to the point of desiring death and the Lord’s answer was to have him sleep and eat and that strengthened him for the journey. It is as true now as the day it was written. Rest and snacks keep you level and alert.

Most loving Jesus, thank you for providing clarity about my schedule and habits. I’m sorry for the times I’ve been negligent in doing your work due to staying up too late. I ask for the grace of temperence to deny myself and turn out the light and to accept that what I have accomplished for the day is enough. I ask this in your name. Amen.


Verse of the day

Last night’s prayer meeting was all about asking boldly and persistently.

Today’s devotional was about praying for big things that are on your heart.

And this is the verse that stood out to me today in a deeper way…

There are big things I have been praying for since I was a teen and have yet to receive them. I have prayed harder and longer for them as the years scamper by, but lately I have reached the point where I feel that I have prayed all the prayers I can for these things. Maybe it’s time to accept God’s denial and focus my prayer elsewhere. However these teachings, devotionals and Bible verses are challenging this line of thinking. As Pat said last night…

“Pray persistently and expectantly. There is no one and done.”

Ouch and ouch.

I have allowed myself to grow weary of petitioning and let the expectancy wane. No matter how many prayers I prayed for it yesterday, I still need to pray for it today.

Jesus, I trust in you. Strengthen me for this journey. Align my will with yours that I may ask well and receive my heart’s desires. I ask this in your name. Amen.

Coincidence? I think not

Let me just say it. There are no coincidences.

This morning I slept through my alarm and forgot my swim bag when I rushed out the door for work. Since I am teetering on the edge of a cold, I decided it would be wise to skip swimming after my shift.

Since I wasn’t in a rush to get to the pool, I had time to make a return that I couldn’t do earlier in the week, grab a few H&B products and pick up an order that arrived a day early at another store.

On my way out of the second store a familiar voice said “I know you!” A woman I used to be in church choir with approached me. For the next 45 minutes we talked about work, wellness and faith in front of the exit. I shared about my past non-denominational Bible study experience, how I am currently a Catechist Aide, an adult leader at a youth group and attend prayer meetings at a local parish. I invited her to come. She said she would and invited me to come to see her sing at her parish.

When we parted ways, she left with a smile. “I talked to you more now than I ever have before!” That’s God at work for you.

God’s fingerprints are all over my day. From my swim bag, to my scratchy throat, to my successful second return attempt, to having the same dollar amount spent on H&B, and to the early order pickup. How easy it would have been to miss running into her! Yet, God timed our meeting perfectly. I don’t know what his intention was for our meeting, but as people of faith we need each other. We need to be able to share our experiences, testimonies, and struggles and provide support and encouragement to one another. We were not created to be islands, we were made for community. We were made to be one in the body of Christ.

Warrior Princess

In Spring of 2018 I had a prayer team pray over me during retreat. The ladies received insight about my life and I was described as a warrior princess. (Xena XD) I am the daughter of a king so that makes me a princess, and I am a warrior on my knees battling the forces of darkness. This really spoke to me as it was especially true of that time. To remind myself of this, I bought the pictured necklaces to wear together.

In light of my recent spiritual warfare, I made sure to wear them today. 🙂

No matter what battles I face, God is my champion.

“Do not be afraid or discouraged… for the battle is not yours but Gods.” – 2 Chronicles 20:15

Growing Pains

Thank you so much for your prayers!

After lunch “That’s enough of that.” suddenly came out of my mouth and I felt like myself again. It is grace. I don’t have all the answers, but I have an idea on what to work on next.

Every time God sends an internal storm my way, it is to challenge wrong or inflexible thinking and to reveal where I need to trust him more. Sometimes they are brief, less than an hour affairs. Other times they exceed a week. And there are times I pray for things …and forget that I will have to change to receive them.

One reference that I’ve been thinking about today is from the anime Soul Eater. Maka was the leader of a three person team and everyone was to match her soul resonance wavelength. One of the two refused to match her wavelength and their team failed the test. The arguing got so bad that Maka ran off and cried. After receiving direction from her teacher, she returned and had everyone match the rebels wavelength instead and they were able to complete the test successfully. Maka had to be challenged to see the big picture and change her approach by letting go of her need to control how they reached the goal.

Pulling Out the Rug

And twisting the knife.

How do you know when God is redirecting or when you need to bunker down and weather the storm?

I received a shock today and it goes against what has been revealed and confirmed to me time and time again in prayer. I feel lost and betrayed. Why is God allowing this suffering? Why would he confirm what he has said if it was going to lead me here?

The first reading today from Habbukuk foreshadowed the depths of my struggle today.

How long, O LORD? I cry for help
but you do not listen!
I cry out to you, “Violence!”
but you do not intervene.
Why do you let me see ruin;
why must I look at misery?
Destruction and violence are before me;
there is strife, and clamorous discord.
Then the LORD answered me and said:
Write down the vision clearly upon the tablets,
so that one can read it readily.
For the vision still has its time,
presses on to fulfillment, and will not disappoint;
if it delays, wait for it,
it will surely come, it will not be late.
The rash one has no integrity;
but the just one, because of his faith, shall live.

I know that God is faithful and that I should be praising through the pain. The temptation is to wallow in my misfortune, but God is good all the time even when things don’t go in my favor.

Please pray for me.